A few hours later, I found myself sitting in the living room of Barbara and Charlie Tanner's house. I looked around and mentally rolled my eyes. I couldn't deny they had a beautiful house, but something about it just bothered me. It was too clean or something. The place looked like it hadn't even been lived in. Everything was always so spotless, and that simply bugged the heck out of me. Homes weren't supposed to look like that all the time. For the life of me, I couldn't imagine Dean and his siblings growing up in this house.
Whenever we came to visit, it always seemed like Barbara was lurking just around the corner to check up on us to make sure we weren't making a mess of some sort. I decided she was probably the same way with her own kids, and that was probably why Dean had the tendency to act ridiculously childish from time to time. He was probably just going through his second childhood since his mother probably harped on him every day of his life while he was growing up.
Barbara, obviously, wasn't my favorite person. She always seemed too overbearing to me. It had been Barbara's idea for Cat and I to call her and Charlie 'grandma' and 'grandpa.' Cat always said she thought Barbara only wanted us to call them that in case her friends ever met us because Barbara seemed vain enough to worry about what people would think if she told them we were her step-grandchildren. I always thought Cat's theory was a little overboard, but I had to admit Barbara was pretty vain. I could only imagine what her reaction was when Dean first told her he was dating someone with two small children. I was willing to bet that the news didn't sit too well with her.
I snapped back to reality when I felt a hand on my arm. I looked up and saw Sage staring at me intently. She looked like she was waiting for some sort of a response. I shook my head slightly.
"What did you say, sweetie?" I asked as she climbed onto my lap and I wrapped my arms around her little waist.
"Ana, I'm bored," Sage sighed as she rested her head on my shoulder and stared up at the white ceiling.
Dean and my mom were in the kitchen with Barbara and Charlie, and I was in the living room supervising over my siblings as they played. Barbara practically insisted Sage, Eli, and Hurley not be left without someone watching over them, so, naturally, I volunteered to do the job.
"What do you want to do, Sagey?" I asked as I ran my fingers through her thick, curly blonde hair.
All of us girls took after our mother and inherited her curls. Sage, Eli, and Hurley also had dark blonde hair like our mother, but I had dark hair like my father. Dean also had dark hair, which was why many people mistook him for my dad.
"Can we go outside?" Sage pouted. "Grandma and grandpa's toys suck."
"Shh, you better not let mom hear you say that," I scolded.
Sage stuck her tongue out at me as I pushed her off my lap. "I'll go see if it's okay for us to go outside," I commented with a soft sigh as I walked down the hall. My mom looked up at me as I walked into the kitchen.
"Are the kids behaving?" she asked.
"Yeah," I nodded. "They want to go outside to play. Is that okay?"
"Are you going to keep an eye on them?" Barbara asked quickly.
I bit my tongue and refrained from rolling my eyes and telling her no, I was going to let them go outside alone and hope for the best.
"Yeah, I'm going out with them," I replied wearily.
"You could take them to the park just around the block," Dean suggested. I think he could sense I was just as bored as my siblings and couldn't wait to get away from Barbara and Charlie's house.
"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Barbara butted in before I could respond to Dean's suggestion.
"Mother, I'm sure they'll be fine," Dean said, winking at me. "I think Ana is capable of handling things, don't you, Ana?" he asked, looking at me.
"Yeah," I nodded. "What time do you want us back here?" I asked.
Mom glanced at her watch. "How about 5:30?" she replied.
"Okay," I nodded before heading back into the living room to take my siblings and retreat from the Tanner's house.
After a short walk to the park, Eli and Sage immediately ran over to the jungle gym to play with some other kids their age, and I took Hurley over to the swings and secured him in one of the seats for an infant before I began to push him slowly. Hurley loved to swing. When he was younger, the only thing that could get him to stop crying was to put him in his swing and crank it up and just let him swing until he fell asleep. During that time, mom declared the swing was her new best friend, and she wished Cat and I would have loved to swing half as much as Hurley did because when Cat and I were babies, we'd never let her sleep.
I never bothered to ask her why she didn't just hand us over to our dad so she could get to sleep. I figured he probably wasn't around too much. I loved my dad, but I knew he was irresponsible, and I had no doubt he never tried to help my mom out after we were born. He was too selfish to worry about anyone else. I used to think it was because he was young and wasn't ready for marriage and children, but over the years, I realized that wasn't the case at all. He still hadn't grown up, and he still only cared about himself.
I hadn't seen my dad in a few months. The last time he had visited was my birthday, but he had been keeping his distance. I think he was still trying to comprehend the fact Cat was actually gone. Though no one ever said it, everyone knew Cat and our dad were a lot alike. Cat was outgoing and ambitious like our dad, and because of that, he always seemed to favor her over me. It really didn't bother me, though. I knew my dad loved me just as much. We just didn't have anything in common, so our conversations always came out feeling tense and forced.
As I was pushing Hurley, I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned slowly. I bit my lip and stared at the guy standing before me. He was about a head taller than myself. He had short spiky golden brown hair and rich caramel brown eyes and pillowy pink lips, and he was definitely built. I could see the form of his muscles through his snug Led Zeppelin t-shirt. He shoved his hands in the deep pockets of his baggy blue jeans.
I cleared my throat. "Yeah?" I said. I wondered why this guy was tapping my shoulder.
"You don't remember me?" he asked with a sideways grin.
I stared at him blankly for a minute. If I knew this guy, I had serious doubts I'd ever forget his face.
"Should I remember you?" I replied, raising an eyebrow curiously.
"Well, I certainly think so," he replied. "We were supposed to meet up at a party a while back, but you stood me up."
I stared at him blankly. I knew right then he thought I was someone else because I most definitely would not have stood up a good looking guy like him, but I was beginning to get an idea of what this was all about. "Wait, who do you think I am?" I asked.
He just grinned. "What do you mean who do I think you are?" he replied, rolling his eyes. "You're Cat."
I swallowed hard. That was the exact response I was expecting, but it didn’t make it any easier to hear.
"Actually, no, I'm not," I replied, biting my lip. "My name is Ana," I continued. I expected it to click with him then because most of the time whenever I told someone who thought I was Cat what my name was they immediately knew I was Cat's twin sister, but this guy just stared at me blankly.
"Oh, I'm sorry," he said as his cheeks flushed. "I was sure that you were someone else," he said as he turned to walk away.
"Wait!" I said quickly.
He turned back toward me. "Yeah?"
"You're not completely wrong though," I said. "Cat is my sister … my twin sister," I explained.
"Really?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah," I nodded. I was surprised he didn't know Cat had a twin sister. She usually told everyone as soon as she met him or her. She thought it was really cool to have a twin, and she always liked to see people's reactions.
He finally cracked a smile. "Well, at least now I don't feel like a complete moron," he said.
"Don't worry about it," I shrugged. "This kind of think happens a lot more than you'd think."
"So, um, where is Cat?" he asked curiously.
I took a deep breath. I don't know why it didn't hit me immediately that if he thought I was Cat, he, obviously, didn't know she was dead.
I coughed and tried to clear my throat. "Um, Cat … is … I mean, she …" I began unsteadily as Sage ran over to me.
"Ana, Eli fell and hurt his knee!" she exclaimed.
I turned to the nameless guy and gave him an apologetic look as I took Hurley out of his swing. "Sorry, I have to go check on my little brother," I said quickly before hurrying off after Sage.
I handed Hurley over to Sage as I kneeled down to pick up Eli. "What's wrong, buddy?" I asked.
"I hurted my knee," he pouted as he wiped his nose with the back of his hand. I inspected his knee and found it was nothing more than just a scrape.
"Aw, that's not so bad," I said. "Does it hurt very much?"
"A little," Elijah replied.
"Well, I guess we're going to have to go back to grandma and grandpa's and fix you up then," I stated.
"NO!" Elijah exclaimed, shaking his head. "It doesn't hurt at all! Can we stay?"
I smiled softly. Evidently, I wasn't the only one who didn't want to go back to Barbara and Charlie's.
"Yeah, we can stay," I replied. "Just be more careful, okay?"
"I will," Elijah nodded as he hopped up and ran over to the slides. Sage handed Hurley back over to me and followed after Eli. I shook my head as I stood up and balanced Hurley on my hip.
"So what do you want to do now, Mister?" I asked, tickling Hurley's side.
"Swing!" Hurley exclaimed through a fit of giggles.
"Of course," I sighed with a wry smile as I walked back over to the swings and put Hurley in the same swing as before and began to push him.
I looked around the park, but I didn't see the guy who thought I was Cat anywhere. I felt bad about hurrying away like I had, but in all honesty, I was relieved by the diversion. It was always hard for me to break the news to people when I was still having trouble facing the truth myself. Even though I didn't know the guy's name, I still felt guilty, but there was really no way for me to contact him.
I shrugged to myself and reasoned I would probably never see the guy again, so it really didn't matter. That reasoning didn't stop my conscience from eating away at me though. Apparently this guy had liked Cat enough to make plans to meet up. I wondered why Cat had never mentioned anything like that to me, but I figured maybe she had mentioned it to me, and I’d simply forgotten. My mind was a pretty big mess after Cat died, so it was possible for things to slip my mind.
However, I didn't think I would forget something like this. Cat always told me about the guys he met, and if she had liked someone enough to meet up with them at a party, I figured she probably would have told me about it. The fact he didn't know Cat had a twin seemed to completely boggle my mind, though. Maybe she hadn't known the guy very well. Perhaps that was why she stood him up at a party, but I couldn't believe that. The guy had been gorgeous and exactly Cat's type. Cat would have never stood him up. She would have got to know him a little before she decided she didn't like him too, and even then she wasn't the type of person to chicken out. She was bold and if she hadn't wanted to meet him at a party, she would have let him know.
The whole thing had me confused, and then I wished I’d gotten the guy's name. Maybe if I heard his name it would ring some sort of a bell in my head. I sighed with discontent and continued to push Hurley a while longer before glancing at my watch and realizing that it was nearly time to head back to the Tanners' house.
Rounding up Sage and Elijah turned out to be harder than I thought it would be because they’d made friends with some of the others kids there and didn't want to leave, but I finally managed to pry them away from the playground equipment.
"Ana, when are we going home?" Sage asked as she dragged her feet across the cement sidewalk.
"Probably after we eat dinner," I replied absentmindedly while bouncing Hurley around on my hip. He was getting antsy with being held, but I wasn't about to let the toddler walk because we were already running late. I wasn't looking forward to hearing what Barbara had to say about that. Of course she would have to point out I was late. She loved to do stuff like that. I don't know if it made her feel superior to point out other people's mistakes or what, but sometimes it just downright pissed me off.
"Ana, I don't wanna eat grandma's food," Sage said, scrunching up her nose.
"Why not?" I asked as I grabbed Elijah's hand. "Sage hold Eli's hand," I said before I looked both ways before crossing the road.
Sage immediately let go of Eli's hand and he wiggled out of my grasp and walked ahead of me once we were safely across the street.
"Grandma's food is always gross," Sage whined. "And she always makes me eat everything! Even when I'm full! Why can't we just go home and eat? Mom's food is so much better."
I cracked a tiny smile and shook my head as I watched Sage's big facial expressions as she spoke. She was quite the character. I could tell already she was going to be quite a bit like Cat. She already had so many of her mannerisms - the way she walked into a room with her head held high and the way she always used over-exaggerated facial expressions to get her point across. She looked just like Cat when she did those things.
"Well, Sagey, maybe you should just try grandma's food. It might not be that bad," I replied. "And maybe if you do eat all your food, we can talk mom and dad into stopping for ice cream on the way home."
Sage made a face but finally let out a huge sigh. "Fine," she shrugged, rolling her bright eyes.
I smiled to myself as she marched ahead of me beside Elijah. Sage was definitely something else, but I absolutely loved her. Cat would definitely be proud of her. She was so bold and knew what she wanted even though she was only a mere eight-years-old.
As we were walking up the steps to Barbara and Charlie's house, I heard someone yell my name. I looked around the yard but didn't see anyone. When I heard it again, I looked over my shoulder and saw the guy from the park jogging across the street and over to me. My heart seemed to stop beating for a second. There he was again - coming straight for me.
"Hey, Sage," I called over to my sister. She stopped as she was reaching for the doorknob. I put Hurley down on the ground and pointed toward Sage and told him to go with her. He raced over Sage, and she opened the door and Elijah pushed his way in before Hurley ran inside with Sage close behind. "Tell mom I'll be there in a minute," I said to Sage. She nodded and shut the door behind her.
I turned and found the guy standing before me with a slight smile on his face. "Hey," he said. "I saw you from across the street …" he trailed off, motioning toward one of the houses over his shoulder. "I hope I'm not bugging you."
"No, it's cool," I shrugged. "We were just coming back for dinner at my grandparent's house … step-grandparents, actually," I corrected slightly rolling my eyes.
"Oh, I see," he nodded. He started to open his mouth, and I knew he was going to ask about Cat again, so I quickly butted in.
"I'm sorry, I didn't get your name back at the park," I said.
"Oh, yeah," he nodded. "Sorry about that. My name is Zac," he said, extending his hand.
"Nice to meet you, Zac," I smiled, shaking his hand.
"Yeah, you too," he nodded as he stuck his hands back in his pockets. "So, I was wondering …" he began as I heard my name being called.
I turned to see Barbara standing at the door tapping her foot rapidly on the ground.
"Yeah?" I said.
"We're getting ready to eat, but we're waiting on you, Anastasia," she said sternly. I cringed inwardly. She called me Anastasia. I hated being called that. No one ever called me that unless I was in trouble.
"Okay, I'll be right there," I said, swallowing hard. "Grandma."
"Hurry up, dear. We don't want the food to get cold," she said, giving me a look before stepping back into the house and closing the door behind her.
I turned back to Zac and gave him an apologetic look. I knew he wanted to know about Cat, and I felt obligated to tell him, but this wasn't something you just blurted out before hurrying away.
"Listen, I've really got to go," I said quickly. "Barbara's liable to blow a gasket if I don't get in there right now …"
"Yeah, I could kind of tell," he nodded, forcing a smile, but disappointment shown deeply in his eyes. He wanted to know about Cat, and I'm sure he probably felt like I was blowing him off. I could have walked away right then, and I wouldn't have even had to break the news about Cat to him. It would all be so easy, but I felt a nagging in the pit of my stomach. I damned my conscience for kicking in.
"But you could give me your number, and I could call you …" I trailed, but then I realized that it sounded like I was trying to hook up with the guy. "About Cat, I mean," I added.
"Really?" he said as his eyes lit up. "That would be cool."
He proceeded to give me his phone number, and luckily, I had a pretty good memory when it came to remembering stuff like that.
"Well, I'll give you a call," I smiled before I headed up the front walk to the door.
"Yeah, talk to you later," he called after me as I turned the doorknob. I glanced over my shoulder and saw him headed back across the street. I watched until he disappeared into a house down the road before I closed the door behind me and headed into the dining room.
"So nice of you to finally join us, Anastasia," Barbara said as I quickly took my seat beside mom.
"Sorry for keeping you waiting," I said quietly as mom passed some dishes my way.
"Oh, you're fine, Ana," Charlie smiled from the end of the table. "We just sat down ourselves."
I smiled back as I filled my plate with food. I honestly liked Charlie. He seemed like a nice guy, but I couldn't figure out what he was doing with Barbara. He was so easy going, and she was so uptight. I thought they made an odd match, but then again who was I to judge? They'd been married for close to 45 years. Maybe there was some truth to the whole 'opposites attract' theory.
"Who was the boy on the front lawn?" Barbara inquired.
"Oh, there was a boy on the front lawn?" my mom asked with a smirk.
"It was no one," I said quickly as I took a bite of food.
"Well, I'm certain he would beg to differ," Barbara remarked. "I know I would if I were him. I wouldn't like to be referred to as 'no one.'"
I bit my lip and tried to concentrate on my food. I hated Barbara. Who the hell did she think she was? I didn't want to talk about Zac because then I'd have to bring up the fact he knew Cat, and then everyone would be acting sad at the mention of her name, and I didn't want that.
"So, you're not going to tell us who he was?" Barbara asked.
I shot her a sideways glance that probably turned out to look more like a glare. What the hell was I supposed to say? If I said no, then she'd be badgering my about it the rest of the night, and if I did tell her who he was, I'd have to bring up Cat.
"It was no one," I repeated again - shocked at the sudden coldness in the tone of my voice.
Barbara looked stunned for a moment before her face grew dark. "I don't appreciate your tone, Anastasia," she said.
I thought about telling her that I didn't appreciate being called Anastasia, but I thought better of it.
"An apology would be nice," Barbara commented. Everyone else in the room was quiet. It seemed like we were all holding our breath.
"Sorry," I finally managed to mumble.
"Now who was the boy on the front lawn?" Barbara asked once again.
"He was just an acquaintance," I finally answered. So it was a little white lie. How much damage could that do?
"See that wasn't so hard, was it?" Barbara said as she cut her steak into tiny pieces. I felt like standing up and marching over and slapping the old hag. She was never happy unless she got things her way. I silently hoped she'd choke on her steak as I continued to eat. "Were you chatting with him at the park as well?" she asked. "Is that what was distracting you from keeping an eye on Elijah?"
"Nothing was distracting me from watching Eli or Sage or Hurley," I replied blankly. What was she talking about?
"Oh, then would you like to explain how he skinned his knee?" Barbara asked pointedly.
I simply stared at Barbara wondering why in God's name she was badgering me like this and why no one was stopping her. I silently wished Cat were there. If Cat had been there, she would have stood up for me. She always said no one could treat her other half like crap and get away with it.
"Oh, Barbie, leave the poor girl alone," Charlie finally butted in. "Eli's a little boy. Boys fall and scrape their knees. I'm sure Ana was watching him carefully, but accident's happen."
I silently cheered for Charlie. At least someone was on my side. My mom and Dean just sat there and let Barbara nag at me. I reminded myself to thank them for their help later.
"So, Dean, how's the new account coming?" Charlie asked, turning his attention to Dean. I sighed quietly to myself. Finally the spotlight was off of me, and I could eat in peace even though my appetite had disappeared long ago.